Sex with him is like slowly dying by drowning. I don't like myself after sex with Tom, but at the same time, it's an end to a means. When he went down on me, I felt like there was fireworks, not the big kind, but the kind that they sell to regular people. I don't think I've ever felt those big fireworks when I'm fucking a guy.
When I took his cock in my mouth, I had no idea what was going on through my mind. I'm not often a lustful person, but I felt a need to get him off, and to get him out of my place as soon as possible. I hate looking at his face, when we are fucking because he's not graceful, or good looking in the sense that Edward is. Which makes it all that more sadder, when we have sex.
I asked my best friend if there was a way to turn my anger for him into passion, and she said it's possible, but for me and Tom I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon. I was thinking if I was just able to punch him in the face, then maybe just maybe I would be a little more happy.